Wednesday, February 26, 2014

30 completly useless facts....about animals

Here is a list of completely useless facts about animals, why? you ask. Why not ?



  1. Giraffes and rats can live longer without water than camels 
  2. More people are killed each year by bees than by snakes 
  3. Dogs have four toes on their hind feet, and five on their front feet.
  4. A cockroach will live nine days without it’s head, before it starves to death.
  5. Butterflies taste with their feet.
  6. Starfish don’t have brains.
  7. Polar bears are left handed.
  8. A duck’s quack doesn’t echo, and no one knows why.
  9. An ostrich’s eye is bigger that it’s brain.
  10. Snails can sleep for 3 years without eating
  11. Porcupines float in water.
  12. A pregnant goldfish is called a twit.
  13. A male emperor moth can smell a female emperor moth up to 7 miles away.
  14. Many hamsters only blink one eye at a time.
  15. Emus and kangaroos cannot walk backwards, and are on the Australian coat of arms for that reason.
  16. More people are killed annually by donkeys than die in airplane crashes.
  17. Certain frogs can be frozen solid, then thawed, and survive.
  18. Cat’s urine glows under a black light.
  19. A shark can detect one part of blood in 100 million parts of water.
  20. To escape the grip of a crocodile’s jaws, push your thumbs into its eyeballs – it will let you go instantly.
  21. A crocodile can’t stick it’s tongue out.
  22. A shrimp’s heart is in it’s head.
  23. It is physically impossible for pigs to look up into the sky.
  24. Rats and horses can’t vomit.
  25. Rats multiply so quickly that in 18 months, two rats could have over a million descendants.
  26. Ostriches are often not taken seriously. They can run faster than horses, and the males can roar like lions.
  27. Seals used for their fur get extremely sick when taken aboard ships.
  28. Sloths take two weeks to digest their food.
  29. Guinea pigs and rabbits can’t sweat.
  30. The porpoise is second to man as the most intelligent animal on the planet.

Did you enjoy this list ? Do you have a useless fact about animals? Post comments below. Share this list with your friends, you'll be smarter than them if you do. 

Monday, February 24, 2014

The loss of a husband, brother, son and friend

Today I learned of the passing of a high school classmate. His wife and a few other family members all attended the same high school as me. I didn't know him very well, but I had a couple classes with him over the years. From What I did know of him he was the kind of guy who's light shined so bright it was like his own personal sun. He was the life of the party, the one everyone wanted to know. He was nice to everyone and incredibly funny. Him and his wife were high school sweethearts. They spent the last 15 years loving each other. Through that love they had 2 beautiful daughters. His light and love will truly be missed by all who knew him. 

Sitting here thinking about him and the lose his family is going through makes me think back to two years ago when one of my best friends lost her husband. The pain she went through and the questions she never got answers to. The pain of the loss was the same, but the circumstances different; One was a medical condition the other was not. Over the time I helped my friend grieve and plan her husbands funeral, I thought a lot about the life of my own husband. When you marry someone you promise to love them for the rest of their life, But what none of us knows is how long that life will be. No one ever expects to bury a husband young, Yet two young wife's have had to do so now. These men were hard workers and loved their families. It's not right that four young children will not get to have their daddies watch them grow. Three  daughters won't get to dance with their dads at their weddings. With a heavy heart and many prayers for this family and my other friends family too, I can't help but hold onto my husband a little tighter and cherish every moment I have with him, however many more that shall be. 

May the loved ones of both men find peace and cherish the thought that their loved one is now in the arms of angels.

Sunday, February 23, 2014

My favorite recipe

 Recently I came across a recipe on Pinterest. (This is my all-time favorite place to find recipes) Like many of my friends, I have pinned hundreds of recipes. I have also made a bunch of them. The one I liked the most is for a garlic basil cream sauce. It can be served over pasta or as the recipe calls for, over breaded chicken. I'm not sure who the original author of this recipe is, and I am not taking credit for it. It's just too good and too easy for me to have invented. Check it out and give it a try for yourself. You will not regret it.

              
 Basil Cream Sauce 
1/4 cup milk 
1/2 cup bread crumbs 
2 tsp bell pepper seasoning
1 pound boneless, skinless chicken breast; 4 halves
3 tbs butter 
3 cloves garlic- chopped
1/2 cup chicken broth 
1/2 can italian style diced tomatoes- drained and finely chopped 
1 cup heavy whipping cream 
1/2 cup Parmesan cheese  
2 tbs basil 

~ Melt Butter in a frying pan on medium heat
~In seperate bowls place milk and breadcrumbs
~ Bread the chicken by first dipping it in milk to coat and then immediately in bowl of bread crumbs. use a spoon to help you coat it completely
~ Brown chicken in pan with butter
~Take chicken out and set aside
~Add  garlic to pan. cook 1 minute 
~Add broth, bring to a boil 
~Stir occasionally to loosen brown parts on bottom of pan
~Stir in cream and tomatoes, bring to a boil, and stir for 1 minute. 
~ Reduce heat to low
~Add cheese, basil and a dash of pepper, stir and cook through, let sit to thicken. 

I served this the other night over pan-cooked chicken, and a bed of gluten free spaghetti noodles. It was fantastic. In the past I have done the breaded chicken and it too was fantastic. 


 Do you have a recipe you love ? leave it in the comments below.  


 



Friday, February 21, 2014

My Amazing Husband

Brag alert !!! This is going to be a post about how wonderful my husband is. Continue reading at your own risk. I will not be held accountable for any vomiting you may have from reading the mushiness to follow.


This June will be our 10 year wedding anniversary. O.M.G I can't believe we have made it 10 years. When we got married people assumed it was because I was pregnant and we thought that was what was expected. In reality, Yes, That was what was expected. But no, It's not the reason why we did it. We got married because we both loved each other and really couldn't see ourselves with out the other. We had talked about getting married less than a month into dating. We had been friends for over a year and a half before we ever moved into a dating relationship. I think this fact played a huge role in our relationship progressing the way that it did. 
Fast forward 3 years and we were in the middle of something that many couples don't survive. Our son's ASD diagnoses. The rumored divorce rate in families with autistic children is like 70%. OUCH !!
But somehow we found the strength to keep it all together. We have had a few rough spots along the way, but nothing too major. We take time for each other. We talk to each other,  and we are very physical with each other. I'm not just talking sex people, get your heads out of the gutter. We hold hands, we hug, we kiss often and just touch one another. Physical contact in any form is very reassuring. Someone who doesn't love you will not make the effort to touch you. 

My husband is very silly. He might be 9 years older than me, but he sure don't act like it. He's goofy, he tells jokes and is generally just silly. We play around together and with the kids. We have tickle fights and those usually turn into an impromptu wrestling match. (usually because I'm trying to get away before he makes me pee my pants, and he's holding me down so I won't get away) We laugh at each other all the time. But we can also laugh with each other too.

He helps me around the house - He cooks, he cleans and he gives me so much help with the kids. He allows me to have time to myself. This is a huge factor in why our marriage has worked. 

We support each other. He works full-time and has been going to school to finish his biology degree. I became a stay-at-home-mom to help him finish. While, his working and going to school while I was home worked for us for those 5 years, it doesn't anymore.

He supports me.- I'm back in the workforce. I see the time I'm at work the way I used to see my time out with my friends. It's my mommy's having a time-out time. I get to take off the MOM hat and put on the AMANDA hat. and I love that. I miss my kids when I'm gone, but that's all forgotten when I get home and discover the giant messes they have made for me while I was gone. Only partially kidding here, but seriously, He does WAY more than a lot of guys I know. 
some of my friends are having some serious marital issues right now and hearing about them all, makes me more appreciative of my husband and all he does for me. 
He makes my life easier. He doesn't have to, but he does.  He is there for me in all the ways I need, and even in the ones I'm not aware I need.

What I want to be when I grow up

When we are kids we dream about the things we will do when we grow up. We dream of becoming wonderful, splashy things like a ballet dancer, or a rock star.  When I was five...
                                           I wanted to be an Olympic Gymnast .


As we grow our dreams change and grow with us.
 When I was 10......
                                         I wanted to be a veterinarian. 


I loved animals and thought that was what I would do for the rest of my life. As I  learned more about the job, I learned I would be making animals feel better when they were sick or injured, but I would also have to put them to sleep. That was not what I wanted to do to the sweet lovely animals.

So my dreams changed yet again.

When I was 12 I dislocated my right knee in soccer practice. This resulted in a couple months of physical therapy. I began learning exercises to strengthen my muscles and ligaments around the knee cap.I didn't like doing them because they hurt. My therapist wouldn't let me back down. She made me work hard and in the end I was able to play soccer again in no time.
My freshman year of High School, I did it again. This time in cheerleading practice. unlike the first time, I wasn't going to get better by just doing exercises. This time I needed surgery to reattach the ligaments. I had ripped my Medial Collateral Ligament (MCL). After surgery I needed PT again. This time Suzzie ( The same therapist from last time) wasn't going to let me back down. She made me work hard. very hard. Some times I left in tears because it hurt so much. But, the day I was able to take off the brace and walk again all on my own, was the moment I knew all the blood, sweat and tears was so worth it.

And  in that moment I knew....
                                            I wanted to be a Physical Therapist when I grew up. 

 
I asked Suzzie what I needed to do, what I needed to study to be like her. She gave me some tips and advice. I set my goals and had a deadline. I was going to do this. I scheduled my classes toward the sciences.  I loved Anatomy and Physiology !
But alas it was not meant to be. I couldn't afford college.

After high school I moved in with my cousin and got a job at a grocery store. I was a checker in 3 months after starting out as a courtesy clerk ( a bag girl, for the older crowd) I took classes at the community collage and started to dream again......

                                           Only I had no idea what I wanted to be when I grew up.


I got married and had my first child at age 20. I went to dental assisting school and was working full time. 3 years later I found myself laid off from my dental job and expecting another baby. We took this time to let me become a stay at home mom. My dream became....

                                             I want to be a mom when I grow up


I loved it. I was able to have a very relaxing pregnancy. I was able to reconnect with my son in a way I had not while I was working and going to school. The first few months were hard, as I've mentioned in posts before. This was the acclimation period for my son and I. We needed the time to get to know each other again, to learn each others routines and moods.
When my daughter was born all I wanted to do was be mommy to both my kids. My days were long, and thankless, but when my kids smiled or said mommy I knew it was all worth it. 
Now my kids are growing...
This last summer I returned back to work. The same work I was doing at 18. I'm a grocery checker again.
This time I'm 30 and looking for more in a job than just money. I'm looking for growth and improvement.
I need development in a job, not just the same thing every single day. I'm not going to find that in my current job. but, yet again....
                                             I have no clue what I want to be when I grow up


I have a very outgoing personality.I can talk to just about anyone, about anything. I love my job right now because I get to talk to hundreds of people each day, and no two customer interactions are the same. I'm creative and love home design. I worked in a floral shop in high school and love plants. I have so many sides to me that it makes it so hard for me to pick just one.
How do I decide ?
When do I decide ? When I'm applying for social security ?
When it's too late ? Never ?
I wish there was a way to mash all my interests together into my current job and still make it appealing.

How do people decide this all important question ?
How can people grow and know for certain that they want to be one thing and then become it ?
Am I broken ? is that why I can't decide ?

I love helping people and have been told many times that I would make a good nurse. I've always feared that feild because I am not good at doing math in my head. A skill nurses require when administering medications. I learned quickly the dental field was not for me either. I feel very passionately about Autism advocacy and helpng newly diagnosed families navigate this road. But what do I do with this passion ?
Why can't there be someone who tells us our purpose in life ? Someone who tells us the future ? That's what I need, a future teller.
I'm sure When I'm 40, 50 and 60 I'll be asking this question again. but as of right now.....

I still have no idea what I want to be when I grow up

Monday, February 17, 2014

Things I wish I knew before I had my child with autism

           When Bubba was first diagnosed there were a million thoughts, feelings and fears that ran through my head. I didn't know anyone who had a child with autism and I certainly had no idea what we would be in for. I often wished there was someone out there who had gone through this who could give me tips and ideas, and just plain out tell me what I was in for. since I never found that, I'm writing mine out now for all the newly diagnosed families out there who might come across this one day. 



You just might meet your best friend in this
Early on in our journey, I felt alone. I felt like I was the only mom with a child like mine. I was lucky enough to meet a mom of one of the other boys in Bubba's Special Ed preschool. She has become my best friend. We have been through so much together in the almost 6 years we have known each other. Having a mom friend who goes through the same stuff I do has been a godsend.; So often in this life we lose friends from our pre-diagnoses life. They often just can't handle the extra strain our children can sometimes put on our lives. We are not as able to go out as easily as we were before. Finding a sitter for a special needs child can be difficult and sometimes just not worth the extra stress. We often feel guilty about leaving them, knowing the problems that could arise, so we tend to just not do it. Finding a friend who also has a child with ASD has made things easier. We both understand when the other has to cancel due to a child in mid meltdown. We get that when we show up to the others house the kids will more than likely be running around buck naked and that's OK. the house will be messy and there might be pee on the floor, or eggs, or whatever the child has found to make a mess with, (because I guarantee you, they will,) and that too is OK, because we get it. 

You might need to become a detective 
When Bubba was a baby he cried when he needed something, As he grew he learned other ways of communicating his needs. Sometimes he would lead me by the hand to where what it was he wanted was located. Other times he would just point and grunt at it. This is where I had to learn to be a detective. Determining his grunts was not always an easy task. We spent a lot of time asking him YES or NO questions. Sometimes to no avail. He would get upset and give up. As he has continued to grow his forms of communication has continued to change. When we are out in public he will start doing a high pitched squeal thing when he's overwhelmed and needs a break, or needs to just get out of there.when his behavior at home starts to change we have now learned that it might be a clue that something is up with him. recently he has started to act out. scream and be more moody than usual. We have discovered that this may be due to a toothache. He has been saying his dentists name too, So I looked in his mouth and noticed a tooth that may be bothering him. He has an appointment to be seen later this week.

It's OK to fear the diagnoses.
when my son was 18 months old, he started to lose all of his milestones. He stopped walking, talking and didn't want to be touched or held anymore. He started focusing on spinning objects and stacking blocks. I started researching and kept coming up with the same word. AUTISM  I learned everything I could about it, but I still had no clue what it really was. I took him to the doctor and asked for an evaluation. A couple months later after 4 hours of evaluations and tests, they came back with what I already knew. He had AUTISM. I had hoped I was wrong. The next few months were a blur. I knew we had to take action. The earlier they get services the better the outcome, right? We signed him up with early intervention and the journey was just beginning. I didn't like it. I had so badly wanted to be wrong.

 You'll learn more about trains and elevators than you will ever  want to know. 
Two years ago my son had a seizure, fell and hit his head. He was OK, but he needed stitches. The day after I was a tired mommy, due to being up all night worrying about my concussed child. He was playing on the computer in the dinning room while I was cleaning the living room. After hearing ELEVATORS for the 1 millions time. I told him to just Google an Elevator. Worst advice EVER. He did it. He was watching YouTube videos no more than 30 seconds later. He has gone through fazes like this before. In the past it has been about Pixar, Taco Bell, Wendy's and The movie Wall -E. he finds something he likes and he watches everything he can find on the internet about it, till he finds his next interest. 

At times You might not like  his AUTISM, but You will ALWAYS love your son
Some days the stimming is so bad it's all he's doing, or the screaming is so bad I think I'm going deaf. These are the days when I might not like his Autism. That's not saying I don't like my son, that's saying I don't like his autism. The part of him that makes him miserable, it makes me miserable too. When I've just about had enough I need to remind myself that he can't help it, it's not him, it's Autism. He doesn't want to feel like this, he can't help it. When he was 3 I lost my job and suddenly found myself a stay at home mom. The whole previous year I had been going to school and working full time. I saw my child for maybe an hour a day. I didn't know how to be his mom. It really was a learning curve for both of us. I cried a lot that year. He would spend hours screaming for reasons I could not figure out. At times I would have to lock myself in my room and cry. I would call my hubby at work and beg him to come home. I couldn't handle it. He would always remind me to breathe, he would tell me YES, I COULD DO IT. because I was his mom. and I was the only one he had. We eventually learned how to work together, and the 5 years I spent being his stay at home mom was truly amazing. We still have days like we did when he was 3. Sometimes his behaviors are so bad, I just want to leave, but I can't. taking time out helps. understanding he is having internal issues I can't see or understand helps.

 There is a lot of support out there
In the third year of our journey I came across a flyer that had been sent home in Bubba's backpack.It was for a dinner event for a local Autism moms support group. He was in Kindergarten at the time and I was desperate for other moms who knew what it was we dealt with every single day. So I called up the best friend who also has autistic kids, and told her we were going. She needed this as much as I did, so I wasn't letting her back out of going. On the night, we showed up to a local restaurant not having a clue what we were in for. Recognizing only one other mom from Special Ed preschool, we sat at this giant table with 15 or so other moms. As the night progressed we laughed, we cried and most of all we knew we were not alone anymore. If your local area doesn't have a support group, I highly suggest starting one. 



Do you have a child with autism ? what are the things you wish someone had told you ? 

Tuesday, February 11, 2014

Things I wish someone had told me before I had a child.




~ You wont always feel like it, but you will be a great parent. 

 ~You will be more tired after your child is born than you have ever been in your life, yet you will want to stand and watch them sleep for hours instead of going to sleep yourself.

~ When shopping for that first baby, spend good money on the stroller and car seat. The stroller because you will use it for a few years and the car seat because you will want one that can grow with your baby. They may cost more up front, but trust me, they will save you tons in the long run.

~ When pregnant, you will have the craziest dreams ever. But, no matter how many times you dream it, your baby will not come out looking like E.T.

~ After delivery, you will still look 6 months pregnant. Once the baby is out things don't instantly pop back into place. it takes time.

~ When your pregnant with your first child you will want to read all the WHAT TO EXPECT books. Don't ! save yourself the anxiety and self loathing. it's not worth it.

~ Breastfeeding is HARD. for some it gets easier, For some it does not.

~ It's Ok to feed your baby formula if that's what you choose. What is important is that your baby is fed and is healthy.

~ Toddlers will play with anything, toy or not.

~ When you have your first baby,  Take advantage of the time when the baby sleeps. Get some sleep too.

~ Take lots of pictures, babies change so much, so quickly.

~ Just enjoy being a parent. 


What do you wish someone had told you before you had a child ? leave a comment below.

Friday, February 7, 2014

Things I've learned from marriage


This year my hubby and I will be celebrating our 10 year wedding anniversary. Our marriage has in no way been a perfect one, but it has been a mostly happy one. We have had our ups and downs and will continue to do so in the years to follow I'm sure. The following is some of the things I've learned in my 10 years with him

                                        Hubby and I in 2004 with baby Bubba.


Patients really is a virtue

When dealing with men, whether in my job or my home life, I have learned to be patient.They just don't do things as fast as women do. They take time and think it over, they act slowly. and multitasking is a foreign language to them.  So the next time you ask your husband to take out the garbage or fix the leaky faucet and a week later they are still there or not fixed, it could be because he is contemplating the best course of action.Give him a gentle reminder and wait. If next week it's still not done, it might be time to call the plumber and heft the garbage out on your own.

Communication is vital

My parents were married for 27 years. On that 27th year my father announced he wanted a divorce, he'd had enough and he was done. I wasn't shocked by this, I was more shocked it hadn't happened sooner. You see the one thing I never saw my parents do was communicate. As a child, I saw them fight and yell and argue, but I never saw them communicate with each other. If my dad did something that upset my mom she would storm off and sulk in her room. She never told him how she felt. How his actions hurt her or his words cut her. She would just disappear and not communicate. I've learned If you don't tell your partner how they make you feel, then they never get the opportunity to learn from their actions and make it right. If you are the type of person who shuts down, maybe writing a letter to them is a better approach for you. Face to face confrontation can be hard, and isn't for every one.Communicate with your partner the best way you can. shutting down shuts them out and that's just not fare to anyone involved.

Never stop being friends

Most relationships and marriages start with friendships. You have to like who you are with. It's just that simple. When you start to forget why you are with your partner, remember why you became friends with them in the first place. Were they funny, nice or smart? Was it their kindness that attracted you to them? whatever it was keep it in mind. You'll start to see those traits in your partner again

 Date nights are vital

 When you are an adult your life is super busy, add in kids and a job and it could seem like every second of your day is full. It's important to take time for each other away from the kids, and work and home. Go out to dinner, or see a movie, or even just go for a long walk together. Time alone with the one you love is vital to any relationship. It gives you time to reconnect and communicate. Some people like to schedule date nights once a month, but for some it's not financially doable. My husband and I get a date night about once every three months, less if we are lucky. it's time we treasure together, and that's what is important. We don't talk about the kids, or the bills, or our stresses. we just talk.Last year when we were living with the hubby's parents we would sneak out just to go to the store together.

 Life is not a fairytale

 All little girls grow up believing they are princesses, and one day they will find their price charming. I'm sorry to tell you, he does not exist. Once women give up the notion that he's out there somewhere just waiting the better relationships they will have. Your husband is not a price, he's not there to protect you from dragons and trolls. He's your partner, he's your other half. Life is hard and it never works out the way we think it will. holding onto unrealistic expectations of how life should be will do nothing but lead to disappointments. take each day as it comes, and when trouble arises, face it head on, don't wait for your knight in shining armor to rescue you.also if you are single, give up the notion that Mr. Perfect is out there.He's not.

It's  important to let things go

The most important thing I have learned in my marriage is to let things go. holding onto the small stuff in life leads to undue stress and resentment. People make mistakes, forgiveness is necessary for love to grow. Give up old grudges and forgive mistakes. we are all human and no one is perfect.

It's a constant work in progress 

The people my husband and I were when we got married are not the people we are today. We both have gotten older and  sure hope wiser. Time changes you, it can make you wiser or it can brake you and make you skeptical. Relationships need to be nurtured and cared for to grow and develop. Just like our children we love and care for each day, so do we need to love and care for our relationships too.

You have to remember who you were as a couple before you got married.  

Recently my kids spent a long weekend at the beach with their grandparent. Even though both my hubby and I had to work, we snuck in a movie date and a late dinner together. The next day we got to sleep in and snuggle up together before starting our days. One of the days I didn't work, but he did. I spent the whole day cleaning the house and doing the things I can't usually get done with kid's around. I was in such a good mood I made a lovely dinner for us and when he got home I met him at the door with a nice cold beer. to my shock and surprise he had a beautiful bouquet of pink roses for me.These simple gestures really touched both of us. It felt like we were dating again. The things you do for your significant other when you were dating showed them how much you cared. It's important to not forget those things, or those feelings.

 If you stop fighting with your partner, the marriage is over  

This is probably my most important marriage rule. When you no longer care enough to fight with your partner, you no longer care enough to fight for your partner. I've seen friends who have gone through divorces just give up.When one or the other partner gives up the love is gone, the fight is gone and then everything is gone. I live with his rule. I've seen it destroy marriages. I've also seen it save marriages. When you fight, truths are revealed. Passion usually sparks honestly. The things about your partner that have bugged you or the hurt feelings you have been hiding all come to the surface. This is the time to listen to your partner, listen to what they are saying, take it to heart and take action to fix it. Apologize and move on together.



Do have a lesson you've learned from marriage ? share it with us in the comments below.

Thursday, February 6, 2014

A letter to my 18 year old self.

 

Dear 18 year old me,

      As I sit here thinking about what I would tell my 18 year old self, all I can think about is all the people who were in my life at 18. The ones who still are, and the ones I lost; lost through time and distance, and sadly through death. Yes, you will lose a friend. A very smart and loving friend. One who will forever be missed, and who's death impacts your life more than you will ever know.

     Right now you are focusing on Senior year; on cheerleading, on boys and on graduating. Your weeks are filled with school and practice and on the weekends work at the grocery store.

     You're too young to really have any major worries, but they all feel major. You write in your journal about your days. You write about love and loss of love. You write about your fears, and wonder if you will ever find someone to love you. Be patient, he is waiting for you. and you will find him. When you do, you won't realize it right away. You will stumble and fall and he will be there to pick you up again. He makes you happy. and he's a better friend to you than any you have ever had.

     This year will be hard for you. There are a lot of stresses coming your way, some you handle well, others you don't. You will make some mistakes along the way, ones you need to make to learn from. One I'm not so proud of. You almost end it all. You don't know it now and you won't till you are 29, but you are sick. You have a hormone imbalance due to your thyroid malfunctioning. This spring you will go to the doctor and tell her how tired you are, and she will give you anti-depressants. They make you think about suicide. You think about it and when the stress in your life becomes too much, you take action. You fail. It's the best failure you will ever make.

    Right now, being popular is all anyone wants, it's the focus in the land of high school, it's the thing most people will strive to obtain. You don't know it, but you are already. The friends you have will be lifelong. They will be there for you in times of need and times of joy. Two in particular will be with you forever. You might not always be in close contact and distance will separate you, but you will always find your ways back to them and them to you. These are the friends to hold on to. They will mean everything to you one day. All the pettiness of teenage life will be nothing compared to what you will go through with these two, and you all will come out stronger than when you went in.

      I know right now you worry about your future. You worry you won't find love, and that things won't work out for you. I need to tell you to be patient. life is good, but it's slow. it doesn't show all it's cards at once. All the plans and dreams you have for your life are just that, plans and dreams. Plans are made to be broken and dreams can change. Nothing is set in stone. You are stronger than you think. Give yourself more credit than you do. Relax a little and trust more in fate, it will all work out in the end.


Love,

Your 30 year old self. 

 

 

What would you tell your 18 year old self?  leave me a comment below.

Wednesday, February 5, 2014

Four little words


 I was trolling through my Facebook feed today and came across an article about actress Tia Mowry. It was talking about how she bawled like a baby the first time her son told her he loved her. It also said her husband gave her the O.M.G look. I get this one from my(such a guy) husband every time I get overly emotional about anything. it says " O.M.G I can't believe you are crying over THAT." 
I have had that moment. The one where you hear your child say they love you for the VERY first time. The one that melts you to a complete puddle right where you stand. I will never forget this moment. We had been having a very rough time in our family because my husbands parents had been in an almost fatal care accident, and my daughter was only a month old. 
My parents had been over to babysit the littles while the hubby and I visited his at the hospital. His dad was still in the ICU and his mom was going to have another surgery the next day. I remember walking in the door upset that his dad hadn't made any progress in his recovery and the doctors weren't sure if he was going to be paralyzed, ( he broke his neck) My dad sat on the couch in our little apartment holding Roo, while I filled him in on what we had learned at the  hospital. It happened so fast. 
The first time he said it I didn't actually hear him. He said it again, standing at my feet, pulling on my shirt. FOUR LITTLE WORDS. It was all it took to drop me to my knees.
                                                           
                                                  "Mommy, I love You.

My little guy was almost four years old when he spoke those words for the first time. Because of his ASD he has delayed speech. I never thought I would hear those words from him. I have no clue what made him say them at that given moment, but I needed it. 

I remember just dropping to my knees and holding on to my baby boy. I cried happy tears that day. I cried because he said something so real, and so meaningful. I cried because he shared and I cried because I had finally gotten an answer to my prayers.

Sometimes Parents of typical children take this moment for granted. Those of us with kids who have language issues, know this moment may never come for us, So when it does it means so much more.


share your own FOUR LITTLE WORDS moments in the comments below.
Thanks for reading  !!!

Tuesday, February 4, 2014

The start of my disease.


Last year I was diagnosed with a thyroid disease called Hashimotos disease.

it affects EVERYTHING in my body. 
When I was diagnosed I was having some really intense symptoms. I was freezing all the time, in the middle of summer I was huddled under blankets, and in the house shivering. I was having memory loss. really bad memory loss. I had to keep calling Hubby to remind me why I was in the car and where I was supposed to be going. honestly I probably shouldn't have been driving. We would have a conversation and I would think it was the first time, till he would say, "we talked about this the other day, don't you remember ?" But I didn't remember. to me it was the first time we were having the conversation..I even went as far as to accuse him of trying to make me feel crazy. as if I needed any help there. right? 

So I talked to my friend, who was getting worried about me. I wasn't looking the same. my hair was falling out and I was puffy and gray looking. I had no energy. I had stopped going to the gym with her because I just didn't have the energy anymore to leave the house. just taking a shower felt like I was running a 5K. I had become the mom nobody wanted to have, I was moody and lazy, and no fun at all. 
So I called my Dr. She checked my TSH levels and referred me to an endocrinologist. The other Dr's I had seen, a total of 5 in 7 years, all had tested my TSH at one time or another. Some had said it was a little high others had said it was "normal". I hate the term "NORMAL" when it comes to my TSH. just because my blood test says I'm fine, doesn't mean I actually feel FINE. and not one of them understood this. 
So I made the appointment with the endocrinologist, and geared myself up for a battle once again. you see because all the other Dr's who I had trusted because, hey, they were doctors and therefor knew more than me, had all told me YOU HAVE DEPRESSION. 
Not one of them listened to me, not really. all they heard was when I said I was tired, like really tired, all the time. no matter how much sleep I got I was incredibly tired. so this automatically meant DEPRESSION. which meant anti-depression meds. which meant major side effects.       
I'm too damn young to have no sex drive !!!!

So I geared up to prove I was not depressed. This time I was going in armed. I made a list of all my symptoms. 
  •  mood swings
  • very dry skin
  • weight gain...a lot of weight gain
  •  headaches 
  • joint pain
  • hair loss
  • memory loss
  • FATIGUE 
  • bloating and gas
I know not very flattering, but there it was the honest truth about how I was feeling. These things could all be symptoms of many different things. but together to my new doctor they spoke volumes. 

A couple weeks later there I was sitting in the little room nervous I would be shut down again. So this time I brought my husband to explain the things I was going through in case I couldn't or I didn't get it out right. 
 In came this young looking blond woman. she had a cute Russian accent. She sat down and casually spoke to me like a friend would. She asked questions about my life and really paid attention. She listened as I told her how stressful my life can be, at the time we were really struggling with Bubba Boys ASD. 
She reviewed my medical chart and looked at my medical history. she asked about the anti depression meds my previous Dr had placed me on. She asked if they were making me feel better and I told her No, Not really. And that was honest. I had been taking them everyday for over a year, and I had never felt any difference from the day I started, She looked at my recent blood tests and then did her physical exam. She looked at my belly, and then felt around my neck. My voice was very horse and she picked up on that too. She asked how long it had been like that. I couldn't remember a time it hadn't, so I'm guessing for years.
She then poked around my throat and it felt like she was going to strangle me, but I was relieved, because not everyone knows this, but your thyroid is in your throat. It's a butterfly shaped gland in the middle of your throat near the Adams apple. and mine had never been examined by any of the other Dr's who had told me I was hypothyroid and gave me pills to fix it.... along with the anti-depressants. 
As it turned out mine was very swollen, hence the horse sounding voice, and the feeling of food being stuck in my throat all the time. She asked about the memory loss and my husband explained the conversations we had repeated and the meals I had made for what I thought was the first time not knowing I had already made them the week before. She said I was lucky I was seeing her when I was, that this could lead to a very dangerous side affect, and ultimately a Coma,or death. I was scared, but glad I was seeing her.
She was my miracle. This new Dr. was finally validating all the things I had thought I was imagining, because no other Dr, ever seemed to understand it.
She looked at me and said, I'm pretty sure you have something Called Hashimotos disease, but I will do more blood work to be sure. 
She talked a little about what it was and honestly I don't remember what was said after she gave the diagnoses. I was in Shock. I wasn't crazy after all. I really was sick. It wasn't in my head as the other Docs had suggested. and finally I had a name to what I was feeling. 
She said I didn't need the anti-depressants any more, that I never should have been given them, but that this is a common result to General MD's not understanding what they were seeing. We set up a game plan and I was sent for more blood work. given a new prescription for a synthetic thyroid hormone and sent home. 
I finally had a name and a plan. I was finally going to start feeling better........



That was last year. check back for how I am doing this year and the progress I have made with my disease so far.

Monday, February 3, 2014


So many people now a day have a blog. They share their thoughts and feelings and the general day to day of their lives. So I thought to myself, why not join in. So here I am with my first blog entry and no clue as to what to say. 

So, I'll share a little about my crazy life.
I am a mom to 2 young children and the wife to a very smart man. like most kids often do, mine drive me crazy. I think it's a job that they all are born into. They all plan it from day one. My oldest child is my son, my bright and shiny son. He's our Bubba boy. He is severely Autistic and loves Garbage trucks. He also loves trains and computers. He's super smart and super cute. and boy does he know it. 

See How stinking cute he is. 
c.

 
And his sister, the little Artist is just as cute. 

See what I was so lucky to have been given. 

they are my world, and my world is CRAZY. 

Bubba struggles with his ASD and has had a few setbacks this last year. But he has come so far from where he was when he was diagnosed. He see's a speech and an Occupational therapist once a week at our local hospital and twice a week at school. He is in a special Ed program at school where he is in the 3rd grade. He has friends and is doing well in his class this year. It hasn't always been easy. last year I was almost certain they were going to kick him out of school for his constant stripping. but they did not. He has a little sister who is 4 years younger than him. He loves her very much. so much that he loves to pick on her and beat her up the way any older brother would. 
She's a very talented little artist. She sadly did not get that from me. not one bit from me. I seriously couldn't draw a decent stick figure to save my life. but non the less she is fantastic.
My days are spent herding them from home to therapies and to and from school. and to add to it all, I went back to work this past summer. so now I work 3-5 days a week along with my 24/7  mom duties. Mu hubby is a full time employee at my place of employment.(we met there 11 years ago) He is also so incredibly smart and is almost finished with  his double degree in Molecular/Micro Biology.
Hubby and I have been together for over 10 years now. we will Celebrate our 10 year wedding anniversary in June this year. I could not have found a more loving and understanding partner to share my life with. We can spend literally every minute together and still love each other. aside from my kiddos he's my everything, I don't always do the best job at showing it to him, but he is.

My goal for this blog is to share my daily joys and struggles in this life I call mine. I enjoy cooking and reading and listening to music. I hope to share it all with you.