6 weeks to a new you !!!

Have you ever seen those crazy late night infomercials that claim you can change your life completely in just 6 short weeks by using whatever crazy product they are promoting that night, be it a weight loss pill, or a new crazy fad exercise program ? Yeah me too, they never work. 

Well, I have been given 6 weeks to sit at home and do NOTHING. Not one single thing. I've never realized just how much I did in a day till I was told I couldn't do any of it anymore. I can't cook, clean, carpool the kids, do the laundry ( I'm not complaining about this one.) I can't go to the gym or walk around the mall to go shopping (not that I have done this since I was 18, but the option would be nice) Basically I can't do anthing but sit on the couch and get fat. well, fatter.

I went to the Dr. today for a post op follow up. While they said I was healing nicely, they were very adamant about not doing ANYTHING. No bending, NO lifting, NO twisting, NO sitting for too long, NO laying for too long; Basically, NOTHING for 6 whole weeks. Last time I had restrictions like this I got a baby at the end of it. It didn't take me this long to recover after my C-sections, but man, I'm not doing as well with this as I did with those. Everything hurts, sleeping hurts, walking hurts, sitting hurts ( mostly my butt) 

I had a mini breakdown today after visiting work and finding out, even though the Dr. released me back to work on a light duty restriction, they don't allow light duty restrictions and I can't work till the first or second week in JUNE. yeah, the whole month of MAY is off work. I cried in my boss's office when he stepped out for a minute, (don't tell anyone) I panicked, what is going to happen to us financially? I'm about to be getting medical bills I can't pay, and that's going to be added to the everyday living expenses. I was about to start a second job to help cover our bills. That's going to have to wait now. With me having no income coming in, hubby is going to have to work more hours and he's already limited on how many he can get because we work for a stupid union. (Don't get me started on this one.) The only good thing so far is that I may qualify for a short term disability through the union. Hopefully the disability checks start coming in soon and I can breathe a little easier. 

This all could not have happened at a worse time, we were trying to save as much as we could to move to a different apartment in June. Every time we get a glimmer of the light at the end of the deep, dark tunnel, a boulder breaks off the roof and crashes down blocking the way. I seriously need to buy a jack hammer !!! hey, do you think they have a 6 week program on how to operate a jack hammer ? I got the time now..........

I've lost my appendix

 My Easter weekend was not how I planed it.
 Easter morning I woke up in the very early morning hours with sharp stomach pain. I have a history of having cysts on my ovaries and just figured it was one of those again, which Dr's won't do anything for, or a bad tummy ache. I went back to sleep hoping to sleep it off and maybe it would go away on it's own. It did not. I finally went to Urgent care about 2pm. they told me to go to the ER they thought it was my appendix and that I needed to go get an ultrasound and all they had was an X-ray machine. (Not helpful to me)
So we headed towards the hospital, However, on the way there the pain subsided and I figured it was a cyst after all and it had ruptured. pain gone, end of story. I opted to go home and rest instead of wait in an ER waiting room and have them tell me I was fine and there was  nothing they could do, but let me rest it out.
About 9pm the pain came back WAY worse than it had been and it had been bad before.
I called my hubby who left work early and the MIL came to put the kids to bed. Off to the ER we went. We got there at about 10:30pm. I checked in and told them I had been sent by urgent care and that they had thought it was my appendix. I was told to have a seat and wait. they took blood and urine and ran some test, and I waited, and waited and waited.oh yeah, and I waited some more. Finally after 3.5 hours of waiting I was brought back at 2AM. examined and told, I was probably having an ovarian cyst rupture and that like I thought there was not much they could do except manage my pain. They sent me for the ultrasound to check the Ovary and to my surprise it revealed I do not have a right ovary anymore. So clearly it was not a cyst on my ovary, so off to CT I went. Hubby had to leave to get the kids up and ready for school and to release his mom who wanted to go sleep in her own bed, I didn't blame her, I wanted the same thing. shortly after 6AM the Dr came back in and it was determined that I did in fact have appendicitis. I was scheduled for surgery for later that day and moved up from the ER to the main hospital.
surgery was at 3pm and by 6 I was back upstairs in my room and one less useless organ.
at least I'll know the next time I have pain like this in my lower right belly it is in fact NOT my appendix.

Hashimotos is killing me slowly

I'm dying....
No not literally, well not yet anyway, But I feel like I am. This damn disease is kicking my butt. I'm a freaking emotional wreck. I am on the verge of tears all the time, I'm hot one minute freezing to the bone the next. I get pissed off at the stupidest stuff. My hands are shaky, just typing this is hurting. My joints are all swollen and painful. I'm beyond tired all day long no matter how much sleep I get. My hair fell out in giant clumps the other morning in the shower. I have thick hair, so this was devastating to me. I cried. My skin looks like crap too. I'm all dry and scaly. And today at work I flipped out on a coworker and kept forgetting my stupid produce codes. These are codes I know by heart. So tonight as I write this, I am drinking a giant glass of wine, and feeling sorry for myself.

I joined a gym

Tonight I joined a gym......again. 
I know, I know I know it was long over due. The only downside to this gym is it's a bit of a drive from my house. My last gym was 2 minutes away. This one is 20. But, seriously everything else about this place ROCKS. They have all the equipment I like and the cherry on top is they have a massage table. It's automatic and wonderful. You just lay there and it's a massage bed. they have tanning beds too and this stand up fat blaster thing, I'll figure out what that thing is like another day. But I'm proud to say my first day back in the gym was fabulous !!! I worked hard and long and I feel great for it. I'll hurt for sure tomorrow, but it will be a good well earned hurt.

My Best Birthday Ever

This weekend, was my 30th Birthday. I have not had a lot of luck in the party department growing up. Being a spring break baby usually means friends are out of town so, no party. This year my wonderful husband changed that for me. He surprised me with a fabulous surprise party. He and my best friend took me to dinner. Then on the premise that we had to meet a friend of his who had a train set for Bubba, we went to a bar that his friend was the bartender at a couple years back. Before we made it to the bar we stopped at Safeway. Hubby said he wanted to buy some gum. We pulled in and parked. I looked up from my phone and in the car we were parked in front of sat one of  my best friends. I tried to pretend I didn't see her. But, I think hubby knew I had. He got back in the car and pulled out as quickly as he could. It was too funny. When we made it to the bar  the people I love were sitting there. I almost cried. knowing in the final minutes before we got there that they were going to be there and then actually seeing them was so wonderful.
We spent the night drinking and talking. I haven't laughed that hard in a long time.

One of the "goods" in Autism

When my son was diagnosed with autism, I felt like my life as a mom was over. Here this beautiful little boy's future was being ripped away from him before he was even able to grasp it in his little chubby fists. As the years have gone by I have seen a better, clearer side to things. Yes, autism is hard. But, I'm also now able to see the good in autism. One of the good things about autism is the things we miss out on.

Bubba didn't go through some of the typical childhood phases. He never had the "why" phase. Thank God for that one. I hated it when we went through it with Roo, and it has yet to end.


He did however go through the " I have a penis, therefor I must grab a hold of it and never let go " phase. I blame husband for this one. Simply because he is male, and that seems fitting.

One time I took Bubba to the grocery store with me. It's the store both my husband and I work at, so we know just about everyone in there on any given day. This particular day I was talking to a coworker friend of mine and Bubba was in the cart behind me. My friend looked shocked and pointed to the cart behind me. When I looked I wanted to die; Both from laughter and embarrassment. Bubba was standing in the cart with his pants down and grabbing himself. Thankfully he was only 2 years old, so most people who saw chalked it up to him being a baby and a boy.

We have not had the "superhero" phase. This is a phase that as a girl I'm glad we skipped. I don't like super heroes. I'm a girl. I played with dolls and ponies, and occasionally army men (when my big brother made me). I just don't get superheroes. plus there are just too many of them. So thanks Bubba. Momma is happy you are stuck on trains.

And that brings us to a phase we have had and are still stuck on. TRAINS.
most little boys enjoy trains to some extent and for some length of time. For us it seems trains is the only phase we have never phased out of. Bubba has every single episode of Thomas The Tank Engine stored in his amazing brain, ready to pull out word for word at any given time. As a result, momma now has every episode of Thomas stuck in her brain, ramming against the parts that help me fall asleep.

The newest "phase" we have so amazingly discovered in our house is the one that just might send this momma to the nut house. I like to call it "The I'm an oppositional child who is trying to make my mom go nuts" phase. This is where every time I tell him to not do something, he yells the exact opposite. I told him to "stop jumping on his bed" the other day and the response I got was "Start jumping on the bed"!!!
This is not reserved just for me however. I'm proud to say he has whipped this little gem of annoyance out for daddy too. So, YAY !!

Oh and don't get me started on the phase we had last year. That one I'm sure is the reason his poor teacher ran for the safety net that is General Ed. He went through a stripping phase. Immediately joined by  cussing a blue streak phase.That was a fun one. I can't say he didn't learn his language from me, though. Woops. I was however proud when I came to school and the teacher told me he told her to F- it, when he was frustrated beyond reasoning. Is it wrong that I was proud of him for using it correctly? I didn't think so.

So yes, autism is hard, but within the hair pulling and ear piercing screams is a joy, and I'm proud to say, I see it now. 

Things I've never done...But wish I had.

We all have things in life we would like to do. Places to go or things to experience. I'm no different. I've seen a few NW states but that is about it. I've never been anywhere warm, or tropical. I've only ever flown on a plane once. Well twice, there and then back. There are a lot of things I thought I would have done by the time I was 30. Some were plans I had for myself, others are things I figured I'd do as I got older. All of the following are things I've never done, but wish I had. 

• Gone to a Luau in Hawaii 
• Ran a marathon 
• Learned to play a musical instrument.
• Bought a house
• Finished college 
• Learned to ballroom dance 
• Owned my own car (my husband is on the title of mine, not me)
• Gone surfing
• Gone whale watching 
• Seen a Broadway play
• Gone rock climbing 
• Swam with dolphins 
• Watched an opera 
• Traveled to Europe 
• Gone bungee jumping 
• Gone white water rafting 
• Visited New York 
• Gone snorkeling 
• Been kissed in the rain 
• Gone skydiving 
• Celebrated mardi gras in New Orleans
• Gone to a pro sports game
• Gone on a cruise 
• Owned my own dog 
• Gone to Las Vegas 
• Taken a ride in a hot air balloon
• Gone to Disneyland 
• Been to anywhere in California
• Been a bridesmaid 
• Gone on a long distance road trip with a friend
• Lived in another state 
• Seen the east coast 
• Had a bonfire on the beach 
• Counted the stars with the love of my life 
• Ride a train 
• Stay at a 5-star hotel 
• Be completely out of debt 

What is it that you have never done, but wished you had. Add yours to the comments below.